Hacker News

points by hbn 3 days ago | 0 comments

> Introducing a Voluntary Exit Offer

Headline is making me laugh cause it sounds like a press announcement for a new product

"The new Microsoft Voluntary Exit Offer, thinner, and lighter, with 20% slimmer bezels than before"

[–] edstarch 3 days ago

Our smartest, most capable Exit Offer yet.

[–] nunez 3 days ago

And we think you're gonna love it.

_wait_

[–] geodel 3 days ago

One more thing: Don't hit the door on your way out!

[–] fudged71 3 days ago

The new Office, 25% slimmer

[–] geodel 3 days ago

It could be an enterprise product bundled with some MS365 SKUs. They know a lot of MS customers would need such thing in coming years.

[–] carpe171 3 days ago

queue the don draper meme

[–] icepush 3 days ago

cue

[–] ambione 3 days ago

too late, it's queued up. Currently playing : "Co-pilot's greatest hits"

[–] thesdev 3 days ago

First up: Recall

[–] kwertyoowiyop 2 days ago

Exit Offer Vista ME 8

[–] heresie-dabord 3 days ago

"Shareholders will love it! Our company has never told staff to get stuffed better!"

[–] 1970-01-01 2 days ago

"Microsoft ExitOffer 26 is our most secure version of ExitOffer ever, with unrivaled privacy protection."

[–] tavavex 3 days ago

This sounds like satire, but I don't think we're far off from major tech companies announcing layoffs alongside new products at keynotes. After all, their purpose is to drive consumer and investor hype.

[–] loglog 2 days ago

Microsoft Voluntary Exit Copilot, FTFY